Monday, December 29, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 25 (Season 2 Episode Funhouse)
This episode was a perfect example of the 5 Stages of Grief: Denial. Bargaining. Depression. Anger. Awareness. (Note: This revelation didn't come to me until after I began writing this edition. How clever!)
Sometime we don't want to believe something we ignore the evidence/signs. We live in a state of denial.
Dreams can have hidden memories. Dreams can act out hidden urges.
Tony is made vulnerable by food poisoning. As a result Tony admits to Carmella that he is depressed and that it all "a big nothing". Carmella tells Tony that is his mom talking.
Tony gave his mother plane tickets that he got in scam. He was angry with her and maybe sub-consciously gave them to her in hopes that she would encounter difficulties. Also, he would experience the drama as a result.
When you create a distraction you can often find out the truth.
Dr. Melfi knew something was wrong with Tony during their session. Words are not the only clues to a person's state of mind. There are other clues in their behavior that alert you to their real state.
If you are wondering why all the grief...Tony had been ignoring all the signs that Pussy was an F.B.I. informant. In this episode it is finally revealed and dealt with. So long Pussy...
Friday, December 19, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 24 (Season 2 Episode The Knight in White Satin Armor)
This is an episode that has an explosive ending that I have hinted at in the past. I have been anxiously waiting watching this one over again.
Old themes are starting to pull together at the close of Season 2. New themes are developing.
Old themes would be the relationship with Tony's mother. New themes would be how Tony is attracted to the same type of woman. Which ironically is also tied to the old theme. But, more to reveal later.
Tony provided a wise quote from this episode, "those who want respect give respect".
When Tony tries to leave his girlfriend of two years she threatens to kill herself. She makes good on her word but is fortunately unsuccessful. We will see that this pattern becomes a reoccurring theme and a lesson for Tony to learn down the road. He will finally put the pieces together about this truth and how his mother influenced these poor decisions.
Richie is still trying to permanently eliminate Tony. With Jr.'s blessing Richie tries to get others in the extended family to agree to the move. However, he failed. After telling Jr. that he wasn't able to get an agreement Jr. has a change of heart. As he tells Bobby that he feels that he would be better off with Tony because Richie "couldn't sell it". He didn't have everyone's respect. Jr. realized that he was backing the wrong horse. So, Jr. pulls a fast one and warns Tony about Richie's plan. When Jr. admitted that he knew about the plot because Richie told him in his own home you could see the look on his face. He was worried that Tony wouldn't believe him. Fortunately for him Tony decided to trust Jr. even after all their bad history. Sometimes it's best to step back from a problem and look at it without emotion and analyze it for the best outcome.
After learning about the threat on his life Tony decides to take out Richie. Little did he know that a few hours later his sister would be calling him to his mother's house to cart off the body of Richie. Which leaves me to a very big wisdom lesson - don't piss off a woman! Richie and Janice were arguing. Towards the end of the argument Janice was saying what does it matter even if Richie's son was gay. That made Richie hit Janice in the jaw with this fist. Not a slap mind you but a full on hit. Then he said the meanest thing " Oh what, you gonna cry now?" Janice took the gun and wham Richie was taken out. If all men who abused could just suffer the same consequence!
Before Tony leaves the house after cleaning up the evidence there is a scene between Tony and his mother. When his mother begins to say bad things about Janice he tells Janice to leave. Then Tony begins to confront his mother about their upbringing. I don't think that it was until just then that Tony realized his mother really doesn't understand what she did. As Tony is dropping Janice off at the bus station they talk briefly about why they are the way they are. Tony admits to Janice that he is going to a psychiatrist and that she thinks it's because they were raised by a woman who had a narcissistic personality who can't experience joy.
Old themes are starting to pull together at the close of Season 2. New themes are developing.
Old themes would be the relationship with Tony's mother. New themes would be how Tony is attracted to the same type of woman. Which ironically is also tied to the old theme. But, more to reveal later.
Tony provided a wise quote from this episode, "those who want respect give respect".
When Tony tries to leave his girlfriend of two years she threatens to kill herself. She makes good on her word but is fortunately unsuccessful. We will see that this pattern becomes a reoccurring theme and a lesson for Tony to learn down the road. He will finally put the pieces together about this truth and how his mother influenced these poor decisions.
Richie is still trying to permanently eliminate Tony. With Jr.'s blessing Richie tries to get others in the extended family to agree to the move. However, he failed. After telling Jr. that he wasn't able to get an agreement Jr. has a change of heart. As he tells Bobby that he feels that he would be better off with Tony because Richie "couldn't sell it". He didn't have everyone's respect. Jr. realized that he was backing the wrong horse. So, Jr. pulls a fast one and warns Tony about Richie's plan. When Jr. admitted that he knew about the plot because Richie told him in his own home you could see the look on his face. He was worried that Tony wouldn't believe him. Fortunately for him Tony decided to trust Jr. even after all their bad history. Sometimes it's best to step back from a problem and look at it without emotion and analyze it for the best outcome.
After learning about the threat on his life Tony decides to take out Richie. Little did he know that a few hours later his sister would be calling him to his mother's house to cart off the body of Richie. Which leaves me to a very big wisdom lesson - don't piss off a woman! Richie and Janice were arguing. Towards the end of the argument Janice was saying what does it matter even if Richie's son was gay. That made Richie hit Janice in the jaw with this fist. Not a slap mind you but a full on hit. Then he said the meanest thing " Oh what, you gonna cry now?" Janice took the gun and wham Richie was taken out. If all men who abused could just suffer the same consequence!
Before Tony leaves the house after cleaning up the evidence there is a scene between Tony and his mother. When his mother begins to say bad things about Janice he tells Janice to leave. Then Tony begins to confront his mother about their upbringing. I don't think that it was until just then that Tony realized his mother really doesn't understand what she did. As Tony is dropping Janice off at the bus station they talk briefly about why they are the way they are. Tony admits to Janice that he is going to a psychiatrist and that she thinks it's because they were raised by a woman who had a narcissistic personality who can't experience joy.
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 23 (Season 2 House Arrest)
Note: I'm going to try to quicken the pace of these blogs from now on. So, check back often!
This episodes themes: Distraction and Avoidance.
Tony is driven to insulate himself from the business in an effort to fool the authorities after all that murder business and Dr. Melfi is distracting herself with alcohol using it as a coping mechanism.
Tony, in trying to avoid his normal routine, has found more time to think about things which is leading him into a depressive state. Dr. Melfi describes to Tony the anti-social personality disorder Alexithymia. The sign of this disorder is the need to be in constant motion. People with this disorder do not fair well when they have to slow down. Without directly saying so Dr. Melfi is suggesting that is what Tony suffers from. Further, Dr. Melfi doesn't want to admit that she has a serious drinking problem.
When Tony is confronted about his future brother-in-law selling cocaine on the garbage route after he specifically told him to stop Tony ignores what is being said to him and keeps himself distracted with a mundane task.
Tony apparently has had enough of this slow down and returns to his crime family at the end of the episode and quickly reestablishes himself.
In summary this episode's pearls of wisdom:
Everyone has stereotypes about others.
If you are trying to hide what you are doing insulated by changing what you are doing and avoiding the appearance of any wrong doing.
It happens sometimes that the behavior you claim to abhor you actual start mimicking that very behavior.
This episodes themes: Distraction and Avoidance.
Tony is driven to insulate himself from the business in an effort to fool the authorities after all that murder business and Dr. Melfi is distracting herself with alcohol using it as a coping mechanism.
Tony, in trying to avoid his normal routine, has found more time to think about things which is leading him into a depressive state. Dr. Melfi describes to Tony the anti-social personality disorder Alexithymia. The sign of this disorder is the need to be in constant motion. People with this disorder do not fair well when they have to slow down. Without directly saying so Dr. Melfi is suggesting that is what Tony suffers from. Further, Dr. Melfi doesn't want to admit that she has a serious drinking problem.
When Tony is confronted about his future brother-in-law selling cocaine on the garbage route after he specifically told him to stop Tony ignores what is being said to him and keeps himself distracted with a mundane task.
Tony apparently has had enough of this slow down and returns to his crime family at the end of the episode and quickly reestablishes himself.
In summary this episode's pearls of wisdom:
Everyone has stereotypes about others.
If you are trying to hide what you are doing insulated by changing what you are doing and avoiding the appearance of any wrong doing.
It happens sometimes that the behavior you claim to abhor you actual start mimicking that very behavior.
Wednesday, December 17, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 22 (Season 2 Episode Bust Out)
sociopath
a person with a psychopathic personality whose behavior is antisocial, often criminal, and who lacks a sense of moral responsibility or social conscience.
Tony Soprano would make a great subject for someone studying a sociopath. He has no sense of boundaries and has the inability to draw lines at where friendship ends and abuse begins. He feels completely justified in ruining someone's life because he is owed a debt. I get that, I might feel the same. But, what unnerves me is how he tries to be friendly to this individual. As if they can somehow preserve their history of friendship. He's unaware that his actions have consequences. Or it could be he just doesn't care. He really seems unaware. If he had that awareness maybe he would find another way around the debt he is owed. It's a good example of keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
But, back to the Wisdom of the Sopranos. Sometimes it's best to know all the facts before speaking. I do wonder about the nativity of some people. There is a witness to the killing from the previous episode. The witness sees photos of the murder and witnessed Tony and another man (it was Pussy) leaving the scene. Now I don't know much about the study of criminology but wouldn't the fact that these murders didn't really fit the stereotype of a random act of violence. If it's not random then what would it be? Now I'm not saying you should turn a blind eye to crime. But, maybe a little selectivity might be necessary. Here's another aspect of this little wisdom - maybe you will not question why people don't come forward when they witness something. Maybe they are scared. Honestly, wouldn't you be scared?
Carmella is caught in bed reading Memoirs of a Geisha. Maybe she identifies a bit?
When children get older they start to see their parents as people. Meadow has been experiencing this with her father for some time. In this episode Tony has a little too much to drink and has a conversation with Meadow. He told her that he knew that she was more like him than her mother. He also told her that everything he does is for her and her brother. Tony does tell Meadow that she knows she thinks he is a hypocrite. As Meadow walks away she tells her dad that, "sometimes we are all hypocrites." Isn't that true?
If you are tempted by something you shouldn't put yourself in a place where you can succumb to temptation. Stay away.
It should be noted that Janice is just as manipulative as her mother. Back to the parent/child relationship. Sometimes no matter how hard you try there are aspects of your parents that are part of you.
When Tony is talking to Dr. Melfi he discusses the possibility that he creates his own dramas. That is true for him and so many other people.
The best wisdom comes at the very end. While Tony is showing his son Anthony how to steer his boat (and going fast causing a small boat to tip over - because he doesn't have empathy - he's a sociopath you know). He says that when steering a boat you have to anticipate your moves in advance because you can't break or turn quickly. Very true Tony. Very true.
Sunday, November 30, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 21 (Season 2 Episode From Where to Eternity)
This episode opens with Christopher in the hospital close to death. The police are at the hospital asking all of Christopher's friends if they know anything. They must realize that it's a futile attempt to get information from anyone. The family will care of their own justice.
As with most episodes there is a re-occurring theme that threads through the entire episode. In this case it's about hell and admission of truths. However, it ends with a hint of denial.
Christopher dies for one minute. When Christopher comes back he claims he was in hell. Most of these admissions occurred because of this revelation.
Carmella admits that her husband cheats, they choose this life and that regardless of her religion's beliefs she still wants Tony to have a vasectomy. Tony admits that he doesn't think he's going to hell because hell is reserved for the truly evil people - those who harm children and mass murderers. Tony admits that he is a solider and thus will not go to hell because everyone knows what they are getting themselves into in this life they choose. He sees himself no worse than the crooks in the finance business. Tony admits to A.J. after he lashes out verbally to his son that he reacts without thinking. Dr. Melfi admits to Tony that she doesn't see a connection between his ancestors who came over to America and took advantage of alternative opportunities to make a way in the world and how he lives his life. She also admits to her Doctor that she has crossed a line in judging Tony and that is not what she wanted to do in treating him. Dr. Melfi further admits to her Doctor that she has been drinking alone often. Paulie admits that he has done things in his past that will earn him a place in hell.
When one is confronted with one's own death or the death of someone close most people reexamine their lives and take stock of what is real. However, this introspection usually doesn't last long and soon people are back to their old ways.
Also, when needing information from someone it might be a good idea to make them comfortable first. Make them feel secure so you can gain access to what they know. Then once you have what you need you can dispose of the individual. (Dispose for us might mean we don't invite them to dinner anymore. Dispose for the Sopranos means something else entirely.)
As promised this episode ended with a hint of denial. I'm uncertain if this has happened yet but I know it happens at least two or three times in the history of the Sopranos. Towards the end of the episode Tony gets a phone call from Pussy about the whereabouts of the man that took part in shooting Christopher. When Carmella asks him what was going on Tony didn't say anything but he left in a hurry. Carmella knew something was going on. She knew somewhere in the back of her mind that Tony was leaving to be the judge and the executioner. The thing is that excites her. It's not just the money or power that makes Carmella click. It's the danger. The ultimate power grab of being with an enforcer. So, when Tony comes back she begins to seduce him and tells him that she doesn't want him to have a vasectomy after all. She might want to have another child. It didn't take Carmella long to get back to denial.
As with most episodes there is a re-occurring theme that threads through the entire episode. In this case it's about hell and admission of truths. However, it ends with a hint of denial.
Christopher dies for one minute. When Christopher comes back he claims he was in hell. Most of these admissions occurred because of this revelation.
Carmella admits that her husband cheats, they choose this life and that regardless of her religion's beliefs she still wants Tony to have a vasectomy. Tony admits that he doesn't think he's going to hell because hell is reserved for the truly evil people - those who harm children and mass murderers. Tony admits that he is a solider and thus will not go to hell because everyone knows what they are getting themselves into in this life they choose. He sees himself no worse than the crooks in the finance business. Tony admits to A.J. after he lashes out verbally to his son that he reacts without thinking. Dr. Melfi admits to Tony that she doesn't see a connection between his ancestors who came over to America and took advantage of alternative opportunities to make a way in the world and how he lives his life. She also admits to her Doctor that she has crossed a line in judging Tony and that is not what she wanted to do in treating him. Dr. Melfi further admits to her Doctor that she has been drinking alone often. Paulie admits that he has done things in his past that will earn him a place in hell.
When one is confronted with one's own death or the death of someone close most people reexamine their lives and take stock of what is real. However, this introspection usually doesn't last long and soon people are back to their old ways.
Also, when needing information from someone it might be a good idea to make them comfortable first. Make them feel secure so you can gain access to what they know. Then once you have what you need you can dispose of the individual. (Dispose for us might mean we don't invite them to dinner anymore. Dispose for the Sopranos means something else entirely.)
As promised this episode ended with a hint of denial. I'm uncertain if this has happened yet but I know it happens at least two or three times in the history of the Sopranos. Towards the end of the episode Tony gets a phone call from Pussy about the whereabouts of the man that took part in shooting Christopher. When Carmella asks him what was going on Tony didn't say anything but he left in a hurry. Carmella knew something was going on. She knew somewhere in the back of her mind that Tony was leaving to be the judge and the executioner. The thing is that excites her. It's not just the money or power that makes Carmella click. It's the danger. The ultimate power grab of being with an enforcer. So, when Tony comes back she begins to seduce him and tells him that she doesn't want him to have a vasectomy after all. She might want to have another child. It didn't take Carmella long to get back to denial.
Sunday, June 8, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 20 (Season 2 Episode Full Leather Jacket)
It might be a good idea to get explicit directions instead of making assumptions about what someone wants. Richie told two guys working for Christopher, "if there is anything you can do for me let me know." Since Richie made a negative comment about Christopher they took this to mean that he wanted Christopher killed. It was a big leap and a colossal misinterpretation of intent. (Also, if someone is keeping their back to you when they are being introduced that should tell you that you really do not matter to that person.) When you are trying to climb the ladder of success it is important to understand the correct and proper ways to behave and don't try to advance too quickly. You can't start at the top.
Don't give gifts that are important to you unless you know the person who is receiving truly wants the gift. Richie gave Tony a jacket that he truly didn't want and it was pretty obvious. Richie was trying to get Tony to see it as a sign of respect. But, he missed the queue that Tony really didn't want it. What Tony really wanted was Richie to show him respect by building a ramp on Beansie's house. (The same guy Richie ran over earlier in the season.)
Carmella decides to intimidate her neighbor's sister into giving Meadow a letter of recommendation to Georgetown. It wasn't what Carmella said but what she didn't that was intimidating.
Don't give gifts that are important to you unless you know the person who is receiving truly wants the gift. Richie gave Tony a jacket that he truly didn't want and it was pretty obvious. Richie was trying to get Tony to see it as a sign of respect. But, he missed the queue that Tony really didn't want it. What Tony really wanted was Richie to show him respect by building a ramp on Beansie's house. (The same guy Richie ran over earlier in the season.)
Carmella decides to intimidate her neighbor's sister into giving Meadow a letter of recommendation to Georgetown. It wasn't what Carmella said but what she didn't that was intimidating.
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 19 (Season 2 Episode 7 D-Girl)
This episode could have been called Crossroads.
Anthony Jr. is stuck on the meaning of life. He has discovered existentialism and is questing the meaning of life.
Of course our lovely Livia sums it up quite nicely for Anthony Jr. "It's all a big nothing. What makes you think you are so special?" She also shares her wisdom about life by telling him "do not expect to be happy. In the end you die in your own arms." Livia is such a charmer...
Wisdom: Don't go to Livia for advice! But seriously if you know someone in your life who tends to be a bit on the dramatic side maybe don't ask them for advice.
Then there's Christopher who has an affair with his cousin's girlfriend who is involved in Hollywood movie projects. Christopher finally has his opportunity to see what his prospects are for writing. It doesn't go well for Christopher. But you can tell even when the door seems to close for him he still entertains the notion of following this dream. But, in the end Tony backs him into the corner and forces him to make a decision - once and for all. He chooses the only life he really has ever known and the man he has always looked up to like a father.
Wisdom: Sometimes when push comes to shove a lasting decision is made. It is necessary to sometimes force a quick decision. Otherwise, the agony of delayed responses is too much to bear.
Pussy, after having passed his crossroad is now in distress over his choice. He made this decision months ago after having been caught in a an illegal venture. The FBI gave him a choice. Inform or go to jail. Despite his years of loyalty it was fear that gave way. It was sad as he was telling Anthony Jr. the story of Tony's friendship when they were younger. He knew as he walked out of Anthony Jr.'s room that he made a mistake and he couldn't go back. That is why he retreats to the restroom and weeps.
Wisdom: Don't let fear shadow your decisions. (Pussy lesson is also, ironically, also the complete opposite of the above lesson. After all he made a quick decision and for him it might have been the wrong decision. But, he let FEAR take a hold of him.)
I try to not dwell on things that are not Wisdom associated with when it comes to the Sopranos. I'm not blogging about the facts of the show or the artistry, etc. But, I do want to express something about this episode. Since the show centered more around Christopher and the Hollywood aspect it seemed at times that the acting was a little over the top. There was one scene where Christopher was confronting the "D-Girl" that comes to mind. It seems as if a general effort was made to make this episode almost have the feeling of a movie. Of course maybe it's just me...
(I'm rushing through this now because one of my favorite episodes is coming up! The Knight in White Satin Armor. This is the episode where Janice earns my respect! If you have seen it you know what I'm talking about. I can't wait!!!)
Anthony Jr. is stuck on the meaning of life. He has discovered existentialism and is questing the meaning of life.
existentialism
a philosophical attitude associated especially with Heidegger, Jaspers, Marcel, and Sartre, and opposed to rationalism and empiricism, that stresses the individual's unique position as a self-determining agent responsible for the authenticity of his or her choices.Of course our lovely Livia sums it up quite nicely for Anthony Jr. "It's all a big nothing. What makes you think you are so special?" She also shares her wisdom about life by telling him "do not expect to be happy. In the end you die in your own arms." Livia is such a charmer...
Wisdom: Don't go to Livia for advice! But seriously if you know someone in your life who tends to be a bit on the dramatic side maybe don't ask them for advice.
Then there's Christopher who has an affair with his cousin's girlfriend who is involved in Hollywood movie projects. Christopher finally has his opportunity to see what his prospects are for writing. It doesn't go well for Christopher. But you can tell even when the door seems to close for him he still entertains the notion of following this dream. But, in the end Tony backs him into the corner and forces him to make a decision - once and for all. He chooses the only life he really has ever known and the man he has always looked up to like a father.
Wisdom: Sometimes when push comes to shove a lasting decision is made. It is necessary to sometimes force a quick decision. Otherwise, the agony of delayed responses is too much to bear.
Pussy, after having passed his crossroad is now in distress over his choice. He made this decision months ago after having been caught in a an illegal venture. The FBI gave him a choice. Inform or go to jail. Despite his years of loyalty it was fear that gave way. It was sad as he was telling Anthony Jr. the story of Tony's friendship when they were younger. He knew as he walked out of Anthony Jr.'s room that he made a mistake and he couldn't go back. That is why he retreats to the restroom and weeps.
Wisdom: Don't let fear shadow your decisions. (Pussy lesson is also, ironically, also the complete opposite of the above lesson. After all he made a quick decision and for him it might have been the wrong decision. But, he let FEAR take a hold of him.)
I try to not dwell on things that are not Wisdom associated with when it comes to the Sopranos. I'm not blogging about the facts of the show or the artistry, etc. But, I do want to express something about this episode. Since the show centered more around Christopher and the Hollywood aspect it seemed at times that the acting was a little over the top. There was one scene where Christopher was confronting the "D-Girl" that comes to mind. It seems as if a general effort was made to make this episode almost have the feeling of a movie. Of course maybe it's just me...
(I'm rushing through this now because one of my favorite episodes is coming up! The Knight in White Satin Armor. This is the episode where Janice earns my respect! If you have seen it you know what I'm talking about. I can't wait!!!)
Monday, May 19, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 18 (Season 2 Episode 6 The Happy Wanderer)
Who hasn't wanted to slap someone who is just so cheery all the time? I mean what do they have to be so happy about? When your depressed it can be difficult to be around people who are glass half full. Especially when you know the glass is really EMPTY!
Tony had been put in a delicate spot by an old school friend. As hard as it might be to believe Tony lived by a code. I'd almost say he was a sadistic libertarian. He typically didn't mess with someone unless they had done something to him or his crew. They usually, not always but usually, are asking for trouble. His old friend was a gambler. How much of a gambler even Tony didn't fully grasp until it's too late. When he asks Tony to join the Executive Game that Tony was hosting he tells him not to come. He knows it's out of his league. Tony can't protect him if he crosses that line. It's all about business when he does. Of course this guy has a serious gambling problem and he crashed the game without Tony's knowledge. By the time Tony showed up it was too late. This guy was in WAY over his head. As with all nuggets of Soprano Wisdom at first glance you might think what does this have to do with me? I don't run a poker game. I don't have a friend who is a gambler. But, think about this. Have you ever had a friend who crossed a line and from then on the rules of the relationship changed? Easy example are friends who want to start dating. Typically when this happens there is a lot of discussion about it ruining their friendship, etc. Why is that? Because the rules are now different. A line has been crossed. What that means is in the future when you have a friendship with someone be sure you think about the consequences of how it changes the dynamic of your friendship. Same applies with family, work associates, etc. It has endless possibilities of interpretation.
Do you think that people sometimes get what they have coming to them? You can't be taken advantage of unless you allow it. Don't let people intimidate you. Don't be a victim. Tony was upset at Dr. Melfi because he felt she made him out to be a victim. He's was too smart for that. He wanted to be perceived as being on top. Tony is the victor who takes the spoils.
Tony discovered something new in this episode. It doesn't seem to reflect any major change or shift in the plot but it's worth mentioning. Tony found out he had another uncle that was institutionalized. It sounds like he was mentally handicapped. Old family secrets sometimes lie there uncovered.
Tony had been put in a delicate spot by an old school friend. As hard as it might be to believe Tony lived by a code. I'd almost say he was a sadistic libertarian. He typically didn't mess with someone unless they had done something to him or his crew. They usually, not always but usually, are asking for trouble. His old friend was a gambler. How much of a gambler even Tony didn't fully grasp until it's too late. When he asks Tony to join the Executive Game that Tony was hosting he tells him not to come. He knows it's out of his league. Tony can't protect him if he crosses that line. It's all about business when he does. Of course this guy has a serious gambling problem and he crashed the game without Tony's knowledge. By the time Tony showed up it was too late. This guy was in WAY over his head. As with all nuggets of Soprano Wisdom at first glance you might think what does this have to do with me? I don't run a poker game. I don't have a friend who is a gambler. But, think about this. Have you ever had a friend who crossed a line and from then on the rules of the relationship changed? Easy example are friends who want to start dating. Typically when this happens there is a lot of discussion about it ruining their friendship, etc. Why is that? Because the rules are now different. A line has been crossed. What that means is in the future when you have a friendship with someone be sure you think about the consequences of how it changes the dynamic of your friendship. Same applies with family, work associates, etc. It has endless possibilities of interpretation.
Do you think that people sometimes get what they have coming to them? You can't be taken advantage of unless you allow it. Don't let people intimidate you. Don't be a victim. Tony was upset at Dr. Melfi because he felt she made him out to be a victim. He's was too smart for that. He wanted to be perceived as being on top. Tony is the victor who takes the spoils.
Tony discovered something new in this episode. It doesn't seem to reflect any major change or shift in the plot but it's worth mentioning. Tony found out he had another uncle that was institutionalized. It sounds like he was mentally handicapped. Old family secrets sometimes lie there uncovered.
Sunday, January 12, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 17 (Season 2 Episode 5 Big Girls Don't Cry)
It does seem funny to some that I am blogging about a show that hasn't been on the air for years. But, to those who think I'm out of my mind think about this...
In the last week Chris Christie, Governor of New Jersey, is embroiled in a controversy that seems to come from the pages of my analysis of this very episode of the Sopranos. Tony is trying to isolate himself to protect him from the FBI. He has decided to change his mob family's leadership structure to insure he has trusted associates that he can instruct them on what he wants them to do without making it appear that these actions are coming from him. This is not the first time Tony has attempted to isolate himself. I'm not saying Chris Christie had his staff close down those lanes on the George Washington Bridge. No one knows that at this point. But, what I am saying that if he wanted to make the mayor of that town pay for not supporting him, but didn't want to be directly accountable that would be the way to accomplish this. (Very side note - a few years ago I recall reading an article about Chris Christie. It might have been in the Atlantic Magazine. There was a picture of him and his family sitting in their kitchen/dining area. I remember giggling as I saw this picture because it looked like the same kitchen/dining area of the Tony Soprano home.)
Here are some other highlights of this episode:
If you owe someone money you need to think about how you spend money. You don't want those who lend you money to think that you are not being careful with their money. Especially if you are not paying them back.
Respect was a re-occurring theme throughout this episode. At one point Tony goes to visit his sister Janice at their mother's house when Richie Aprile opens the door. He had on only boxer shorts and a wife beater. Tony told him to put his pants on. Richie didn't. He completely ignored Tony's request. This is a not a subtle hint that Richie doesn't respect Tony. Not surprisingly they end up in a verbal fight.
Back at the restaurant Paulie and Pussy are eating. Furio joins them. The boss of New York, Johnny "Sack" (wonder what this nickname is all about?) enters the restaurant. All but Pussy stands up to greet Johnny. It's pretty obvious here that Pussy doesn't respect Johnny. You can even further assume that he probably doesn't respect any of them.
At one point Tony is shown observing others at a party in his home being held for the newly transplanted Furio. I'm sure Tony is well aware that you can learn much by just watching how others interact with each other.
It's important to find someone you can fully trust to listen and help guide you through your issues.
Tony finds out in the episode that his dad actually suffered from panic attacks. It's a simple wisdom that we tend to repeat the past. No matter how much you think you are different from your parents you still share some of the same issues.
One personal observation - when Tony is talking to Hesh (his and in the past his father's confidant) Tony is talking about his panic attacks and Hesh starts to drift into a completely different conversation. They are both talking at the same time. However, not talking about the same thing. This happened again later in the episode. I had to laugh as I have a similar situation with someone in my life. (I can't say who but if you are reading this it's not you!) It's difficult to sometimes have a conversation with this person. It was interesting and I recognized the behavior.
Christopher goes to an acting class for writers. He takes on a role that becomes very emotional for him and he cries while on stage. (He is portraying James Dean's character in Rebel Without a Cause. It was the pivotal scene at the end of the movie where he talks to his dad while clutching his dad's legs.) The next time the guy that played his dad was on stage with Christopher to begin another acting lesson when Christopher punches him in the face. Why does he do this? Adriana seems to think that it brought up emotions stemming from the loss of his father when he was a baby. I think it's more primal. Christopher cried in front of all these people. He needs to now show them he is a man. But, it's more interesting with Adriana's theory. But, I would take it a bit further. It's not his actual dad he is punching out. It's the man who is like a father to him - Tony Soprano.
Dr. Melfi is back in the picture. She decided to take Tony back as a patient. There are two scenes in this episode of Dr. Melfi with her doctor. The first time he confronted her about her feelings for Tony Soprano. She ended up cursing and storming out of his office. This is certainly just want Tony did to her in the past. (History repeating itself anyone?) The second time she is in his office she tells her doctor that seeing Tony was therapeutic. The doctor of course told her it's not suppose to be therapeutic for you - it's suppose to be for the patient. So, Dr. Melfi had some wine and called Tony for an appointment. Their first appointment back was interesting. He wanted to shock her by telling her about how he had Furio beat up some people not paying their loan to him. Tony was in the car while this was going on when Dr. Melfi called him. Dr. Melfi asked Tony how it made him feel. He said he wanted to be in there - in the action - not in the car waiting. She asked him if he would want to be the one giving the beating or receiving?
In the last week Chris Christie, Governor of New Jersey, is embroiled in a controversy that seems to come from the pages of my analysis of this very episode of the Sopranos. Tony is trying to isolate himself to protect him from the FBI. He has decided to change his mob family's leadership structure to insure he has trusted associates that he can instruct them on what he wants them to do without making it appear that these actions are coming from him. This is not the first time Tony has attempted to isolate himself. I'm not saying Chris Christie had his staff close down those lanes on the George Washington Bridge. No one knows that at this point. But, what I am saying that if he wanted to make the mayor of that town pay for not supporting him, but didn't want to be directly accountable that would be the way to accomplish this. (Very side note - a few years ago I recall reading an article about Chris Christie. It might have been in the Atlantic Magazine. There was a picture of him and his family sitting in their kitchen/dining area. I remember giggling as I saw this picture because it looked like the same kitchen/dining area of the Tony Soprano home.)
Here are some other highlights of this episode:
If you owe someone money you need to think about how you spend money. You don't want those who lend you money to think that you are not being careful with their money. Especially if you are not paying them back.
Respect was a re-occurring theme throughout this episode. At one point Tony goes to visit his sister Janice at their mother's house when Richie Aprile opens the door. He had on only boxer shorts and a wife beater. Tony told him to put his pants on. Richie didn't. He completely ignored Tony's request. This is a not a subtle hint that Richie doesn't respect Tony. Not surprisingly they end up in a verbal fight.
Back at the restaurant Paulie and Pussy are eating. Furio joins them. The boss of New York, Johnny "Sack" (wonder what this nickname is all about?) enters the restaurant. All but Pussy stands up to greet Johnny. It's pretty obvious here that Pussy doesn't respect Johnny. You can even further assume that he probably doesn't respect any of them.
At one point Tony is shown observing others at a party in his home being held for the newly transplanted Furio. I'm sure Tony is well aware that you can learn much by just watching how others interact with each other.
It's important to find someone you can fully trust to listen and help guide you through your issues.
Tony finds out in the episode that his dad actually suffered from panic attacks. It's a simple wisdom that we tend to repeat the past. No matter how much you think you are different from your parents you still share some of the same issues.
One personal observation - when Tony is talking to Hesh (his and in the past his father's confidant) Tony is talking about his panic attacks and Hesh starts to drift into a completely different conversation. They are both talking at the same time. However, not talking about the same thing. This happened again later in the episode. I had to laugh as I have a similar situation with someone in my life. (I can't say who but if you are reading this it's not you!) It's difficult to sometimes have a conversation with this person. It was interesting and I recognized the behavior.
Christopher goes to an acting class for writers. He takes on a role that becomes very emotional for him and he cries while on stage. (He is portraying James Dean's character in Rebel Without a Cause. It was the pivotal scene at the end of the movie where he talks to his dad while clutching his dad's legs.) The next time the guy that played his dad was on stage with Christopher to begin another acting lesson when Christopher punches him in the face. Why does he do this? Adriana seems to think that it brought up emotions stemming from the loss of his father when he was a baby. I think it's more primal. Christopher cried in front of all these people. He needs to now show them he is a man. But, it's more interesting with Adriana's theory. But, I would take it a bit further. It's not his actual dad he is punching out. It's the man who is like a father to him - Tony Soprano.
Dr. Melfi is back in the picture. She decided to take Tony back as a patient. There are two scenes in this episode of Dr. Melfi with her doctor. The first time he confronted her about her feelings for Tony Soprano. She ended up cursing and storming out of his office. This is certainly just want Tony did to her in the past. (History repeating itself anyone?) The second time she is in his office she tells her doctor that seeing Tony was therapeutic. The doctor of course told her it's not suppose to be therapeutic for you - it's suppose to be for the patient. So, Dr. Melfi had some wine and called Tony for an appointment. Their first appointment back was interesting. He wanted to shock her by telling her about how he had Furio beat up some people not paying their loan to him. Tony was in the car while this was going on when Dr. Melfi called him. Dr. Melfi asked Tony how it made him feel. He said he wanted to be in there - in the action - not in the car waiting. She asked him if he would want to be the one giving the beating or receiving?
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 16 (Season 2 Episode 4 Commendatori)
Before I begin it's been a while since I've added another analysis of The Sopranos I want to express sadness in James Gandolfini's untimely death is 2013. There was something about the way his eyes expressed themselves in every episode of The Sopranos that brought life to the role of Tony Soprano. The eyes expressed sadness, fear, regret, concern and love. It's possible that the very emotions he brought to the role didn't line up with what we think of a sociopath. It might have not been completely honest. But, without that the show would have never been a success. We all loved the character of Tony Soprano, warts and all. That is because James Gandolfini brought a sense of perverted humanity to Tony Soprano.
Thank you James...
When I watched this episode again with an eye towards my goal of uncovering the wisdom of the Sopranos I thought this one where the gang visits Italy would be packed full of revelations. But, I felt a little like Paulie looking for a connection to the land of his ancestors. I felt there should be more. I'm wondering could that have actually been the plan all along? Noooo...It can't be. But, then again the show is genius.
There was a lot going on in this episode. Tony and his crew go to Italy to meet with an important connected man to discuss selling stolen vehicles. However, he ends up having to deal with a woman who is now the boss. It's difficult at first but Tony finally manages to accept dealing with a woman. He was even able to draw a line between pleasure and business by refusing her advances. Although I'm more than certain he would have liked to have had a romp with our lady boss he knew it was better to "not shit where he eats".
Paulie is meanwhile trying to feel at home in Italy. He is trying desperately to feel like he belongs. He is almost giddy with excitement about being in Italy. But, the natives aren't having any of it...they spurn him constantly. It's not until he hires a prostitute who might be from where his family once lived that he feels some bond with Italy. Paulie's experience reminds me of someone going on vacation to some supposed exciting locale only to find it really disappointing.
Christopher was there. But, his role was wasted being, well, wasted.
Meanwhile back a home in New Jersey Janice visits Carmella and begins to blast her for being with Tony when she is so smart. Carmella turns it back on her because of her involvement with Richie. Wisdom - It is said that you criticize in others the exact characteristics and/or actions of yourself.
Pussy is dealing with his deceptions. As an F.B.I. informant he has become so self involved that he is not there for his wife when she needs him. At one point his wife calls Carmella and tells her that back when Pussy reappeared after having been missing for quite a while a part of her wished he was dead. When Tony walked back into the house and said he was home the look on Carmella's face seemed to say that a part of her too wishes Tony was dead.
Pussy, in an effort to prevent another associate from revealing that he was at a party store with an F.B.I. agent he ruthlessly killed him. There was a cover story for the agent. It's quite possible that no one would have caught on to Pussy. But, he took extreme measures to be sure that it didn't get out.
Thank you James...
When I watched this episode again with an eye towards my goal of uncovering the wisdom of the Sopranos I thought this one where the gang visits Italy would be packed full of revelations. But, I felt a little like Paulie looking for a connection to the land of his ancestors. I felt there should be more. I'm wondering could that have actually been the plan all along? Noooo...It can't be. But, then again the show is genius.
There was a lot going on in this episode. Tony and his crew go to Italy to meet with an important connected man to discuss selling stolen vehicles. However, he ends up having to deal with a woman who is now the boss. It's difficult at first but Tony finally manages to accept dealing with a woman. He was even able to draw a line between pleasure and business by refusing her advances. Although I'm more than certain he would have liked to have had a romp with our lady boss he knew it was better to "not shit where he eats".
Paulie is meanwhile trying to feel at home in Italy. He is trying desperately to feel like he belongs. He is almost giddy with excitement about being in Italy. But, the natives aren't having any of it...they spurn him constantly. It's not until he hires a prostitute who might be from where his family once lived that he feels some bond with Italy. Paulie's experience reminds me of someone going on vacation to some supposed exciting locale only to find it really disappointing.
Christopher was there. But, his role was wasted being, well, wasted.
Meanwhile back a home in New Jersey Janice visits Carmella and begins to blast her for being with Tony when she is so smart. Carmella turns it back on her because of her involvement with Richie. Wisdom - It is said that you criticize in others the exact characteristics and/or actions of yourself.
Pussy is dealing with his deceptions. As an F.B.I. informant he has become so self involved that he is not there for his wife when she needs him. At one point his wife calls Carmella and tells her that back when Pussy reappeared after having been missing for quite a while a part of her wished he was dead. When Tony walked back into the house and said he was home the look on Carmella's face seemed to say that a part of her too wishes Tony was dead.
Pussy, in an effort to prevent another associate from revealing that he was at a party store with an F.B.I. agent he ruthlessly killed him. There was a cover story for the agent. It's quite possible that no one would have caught on to Pussy. But, he took extreme measures to be sure that it didn't get out.
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