The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 17 (Season 2 Episode 5 Big Girls Don't Cry)

It does seem funny to some that I am blogging about a show that hasn't been on the air for years.  But, to those who think I'm out of my mind think about this...

In the last week Chris Christie, Governor of New Jersey, is embroiled in a controversy that seems to come from the pages of my analysis of this very episode of the Sopranos.  Tony is trying to isolate himself to protect him from the FBI.  He has decided to change his mob family's leadership structure to insure he has trusted associates that he can instruct them on what he wants them to do without making it appear that these actions are coming from him.  This is not the first time Tony has attempted to isolate himself.  I'm not saying Chris Christie had his staff close down those lanes on the George Washington Bridge.  No one knows that at this point.  But, what I am saying that if he wanted to make the mayor of that town pay for not supporting him, but didn't want to be directly accountable that would be the way to accomplish this. (Very side note - a few years ago I recall reading an article about Chris Christie.  It might have been in the Atlantic Magazine.  There was a picture of him and his family sitting in their kitchen/dining area.  I remember giggling as I saw this picture because it looked like the same kitchen/dining area of the Tony Soprano home.)

Here are some other highlights of this episode:

If you owe someone money you need to think about how you spend money.  You don't want those who lend you money to think that you are not being careful with their money.  Especially if you are not paying them back. 

Respect was a re-occurring theme throughout this episode.  At one point Tony goes to visit his sister Janice at their mother's house when Richie Aprile opens the door.  He had on only boxer shorts and a wife beater.  Tony told him to put his pants on.  Richie didn't.  He completely ignored Tony's request.  This is a not a subtle hint that Richie doesn't respect Tony.  Not surprisingly they end up in a verbal fight.

Back at the restaurant Paulie and Pussy are eating.  Furio joins them.  The boss of New York, Johnny "Sack" (wonder what this nickname is all about?) enters the restaurant.  All but Pussy stands up to greet Johnny.  It's pretty obvious here that Pussy doesn't respect Johnny.  You can even further assume that he probably doesn't respect any of them. 

At one point Tony is shown observing others at a party in his home being held for the newly transplanted Furio.  I'm sure Tony is well aware that you can learn much by just watching how others interact with each other.

It's important to find someone you can fully trust to listen and help guide you through your issues.

Tony finds out in the episode that his dad actually suffered from panic attacks.  It's a simple wisdom that we tend to repeat the past. No matter how much you think you are different from your parents you still share some of the same issues.

One personal observation - when Tony is talking to Hesh (his and in the past his father's confidant) Tony is talking about his panic attacks and Hesh starts to drift into a completely different conversation.  They are both talking at the same time.  However, not talking about the same thing.  This happened again later in the episode.  I had to laugh as I have a similar situation with someone in my life.  (I can't say who but if you are reading this it's not you!)  It's difficult to sometimes have a conversation with this person.  It was interesting and I recognized the behavior. 

Christopher goes to an acting class for writers.  He takes on a role that becomes very emotional for him and he cries while on stage. (He is portraying James Dean's character in Rebel Without a Cause.  It was the pivotal scene at the end of the movie where he talks to his dad while clutching his dad's legs.)  The next time the guy that played his dad was on stage with Christopher to begin another acting lesson when Christopher punches him in the face.  Why does he do this?  Adriana seems to think that it brought up emotions stemming from the loss of his father when he was a baby.  I think it's more primal.  Christopher cried in front of all these people.  He needs to now show them he is a man.  But, it's more interesting with Adriana's theory.  But, I would take it a bit further.  It's not his actual dad he is punching out.  It's the man who is like a father to him - Tony Soprano.

Dr. Melfi is back in the picture.  She decided to take Tony back as a patient. There are two scenes in this episode of Dr. Melfi with her doctor. The first time he confronted her about her feelings for Tony Soprano. She ended up cursing and storming out of his office.  This is certainly just want Tony did to her in the past.  (History repeating itself anyone?)  The second time she is in his office she tells her doctor that seeing Tony was therapeutic.  The doctor of course told her it's not suppose to be therapeutic for you - it's suppose to be for the patient.  So, Dr. Melfi had some wine and called Tony for an appointment.  Their first appointment back was interesting.  He wanted to shock her by telling her about how he had Furio beat up some people not paying their loan to him.  Tony was in the car while this was going on when Dr. Melfi called him.  Dr. Melfi asked Tony how it made him feel.  He said he wanted to be in there - in the action - not in the car waiting.  She asked him if he would want to be the one giving the beating or receiving? 

The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 16 (Season 2 Episode 4 Commendatori)

Before I begin it's been a while since I've added another analysis of The Sopranos I want to express sadness in James Gandolfini's untimely death is 2013.  There was something about the way his eyes expressed themselves in every episode of The Sopranos that brought life to the role of Tony Soprano.  The eyes expressed sadness, fear, regret, concern and love.  It's possible that the very emotions he brought to the role didn't line up with what we think of a sociopath.  It might have not been completely honest.  But, without that the show would have never been a success.  We all loved the character of Tony Soprano, warts and all.  That is because James Gandolfini brought a sense of perverted humanity to Tony Soprano.

Thank you James...

When I watched this episode again with an eye towards my goal of uncovering the wisdom of the Sopranos I thought this one where the gang visits Italy would be packed full of revelations.   But, I felt a little like Paulie looking for a connection to the land of his ancestors.  I felt there should be more.  I'm wondering could that have actually been the plan all along?  Noooo...It can't be.  But, then again the show is genius.

There was a lot going on in this episode.  Tony and his crew go to Italy to meet with an important connected man to discuss selling stolen vehicles.  However, he ends up having to deal with a woman who is now the boss.  It's difficult at first but Tony finally manages to accept dealing with a woman.  He was even able to draw a line between pleasure and business by refusing her advances.  Although I'm more than certain he would have liked to have had a romp with our lady boss he knew it was better to "not shit where he eats". 

Paulie is meanwhile trying to feel at home in Italy.  He is trying desperately to feel like he belongs.  He is almost giddy with excitement about being in Italy.  But, the natives aren't having any of it...they spurn him constantly.  It's not until he hires a prostitute who might be from where his family once lived that he feels some bond with Italy.  Paulie's experience reminds me of someone going on vacation to some supposed exciting locale only to find it really disappointing. 

Christopher was there.  But, his role was wasted being, well, wasted.

Meanwhile back a home in New Jersey Janice visits Carmella and begins to blast her for being with Tony when she is so smart.  Carmella turns it back on her because of her involvement with Richie.  Wisdom - It is said that you criticize in others the exact characteristics and/or actions of yourself.

Pussy is dealing with his deceptions.  As an F.B.I. informant he has become so self involved that he is not there for his wife when she needs him.  At one point his wife calls Carmella and tells her that back when Pussy reappeared after having been missing for quite a while a part of her wished he was dead.  When Tony walked back into the house and said he was home the look on Carmella's face seemed to say that a part of her too wishes Tony was dead.

Pussy, in an effort to prevent another associate from revealing that he was at a party store with an F.B.I. agent he ruthlessly killed him.  There was a cover story for the agent.  It's quite possible that no one would have caught on to Pussy.  But, he took extreme measures to be sure that it didn't get out. 

The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 15 (Season 2: Episode 3 Toodle-F-King-Oo)

"There has to be consequences" Carmela Soprano

Manipulation of punishment is possible when you offer to give up a want and then determine it is actually a need.  You have the appearance of attempting to do the right thing but ultimately you have done nothing in restitution.

You can't truly disguise your feelings - unless you are careful it comes out in your conversational tone.

Its easy to criticize or comment when it doesn't affect you.  But, when the tables are turned you see things from a different, more direct angle, your perspective and opinions changes.

This episode introduces us to Richie Aprile.  Made Guy...Knowing how he ends up I find it terribly ironic that he tells Christopher, "Look kid, I shouldn't have to explain myself. I'm from the old-school. You wanna raise your hand, you give her your last name. Then it's none of my fuckin' business. Until then, keep your hands in your pockets. We understand each other?" (Spoiler Alert).  Which means watch what you say.  Sometimes things come back to bite (or in Richie's case shoot) you.

One last thought...I would venture to say that there has been no character on T.V. or in Film that had the ability to express so much with his eyes as Tony Soprano.  Thank you James Gandolfini.

The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 14 (Season 2: Episode 2 Do Not Resucitate)

I am increasingly delighted as each episode unfolds. When I started this blog I wasn't sure I would have enough material.  Granted some of the wisdom gets repeated. But, each episode seems to have a wisdom theme that is wrapped around the story line.  This episode should be called loose lips sink ships.  There should be caution in what you say as it may not be received well.  Sometimes you say the wrong thing to the wrong person like when Uncle Junior tells a judge in response to if he has any objections to wearing a monitoring bracelet that it's feels like Nazi Germany.   Or, when Anthony Jr. asks Olivia Soprano why she needs a DNR because he didn't know what a DNR was.   My personal favorite is when the owner of the nursing home Olivia Soprano was living in was running his mouth around town about Soprano business and about a certain son who almost killed his mother with a fluffy pillow.  Guess where he is?  Missing, a suspect of "foul play".  (I think that guy must have not been very smart.)  Another couple of Einsteins are the two guys working at the brokerage firm for Christopher who approach Tony at a pre-arranged attack on protesters at a construction site.  Tony didn't want to be seen there but these two bumbling idiots (and in future episodes we will see what bumbling idiots they are really are) identified Tony and approached him while he was sitting in his car.

It's interesting how you can use loose lips to not sink a ship but instead to save one.  Olivia hints to Janice about where did she put the money?  Implying that Olivia has money and Janice needs to keep her alive so she can share this bit of information.  Olivia has always acted like she is a bit senile but believe me she's no dummy.  She is worried about the DNR that Anthony Jr. asked her about.

Which leads me to sometimes things are not always what they seem.  For example the Preacher who is protesting at the construction site is really on the take.  Or, Tony wanting it to appear the Uncle Junior is still the boss so the Feds will not focus on himself. 

I would be off the mark if I didn't mention the theme of parents and their children.  The on the take Preacher's dad died.  In talking to Tony he mentioned that once the parents are gone the torch is passed to the children and now they become the elders.  Truly a wise observation.

The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 13 (Season 2: Episode 1 A Guy Walks into a Psychiatrist's Office

Michael Corleone: All right. This one time. This one time I'll let you ask me about my affairs.
Kay Adams:Is it true? Is it?
Michael Corleone: No.

The common thread throughout the Season 2 Opener is Lies...

The season opens with Frank Sinatra singing "It was a Very Good Year"  while reintroducing us to the cast of the Sopranos.  All members of the Sopranos family and the extended La Famiglia are highlighted.  Livia, Tony's mother laying in the hospital filled with rage and delusions, Christopher partaking in drugs to escape the reality of life, Tony conducting an extra-marital affair and once home attempts to cover up the perfume smell of this latest mistress by tossing his clothing in the washing machine.  Tony crawling in bed looks at Camella who also turns to face Tony with her eyes open.  Once she sees Tony is looking at her she immediately closes her eyes and rolls over. 

Tony is wrapping up the mess from last season - the attempt on his life.  He is like an accountant with a balance sheet.  When the episode is over he feels like he has measured the risk and dealt with it handledly.  He did it in part by creating a ruse.  In order to isolate your prey you create a ruse to catch them off guard.  Create a comfortable environment and then BAM.  We've seen this tactic before.  Maybe that is why we all get suspicious when things are going well. These wise guys are too egotistic sometimes to catch on to the threat right in front of them.  They continually fall into traps of their own making. 

When you lie be careful to cover your tracks.  Don't say too much that you might say something that contradicts your story.  Sometimes in denying something you actually let something slip that affirms your actual guilt.

Christopher gets someone else to pass a stockbrokers test so he can setup a boiler room selling valueless stocks to unspecting investors. Lies and more lies.

Tony met with Dr. Melfi after he suffered another one of his attacks.  He asked her to continue treating him.  She refused stating that due to her status of being in hiding for a while due to Tony's business she lost a patient due to suicide.  When Dr. Melfi is explaining this I couldn't help but wonder, was Dr. Melfi really telling the truth?

Just when I thought that the Sopranos couldn't bring anything more to the wisdom table he introduces Tony's sister Janice. The dynamic of siblings will bring more to the discussion of wisdom in the following episode reviews.  For this episode let's keep to the fact that Janice was not completely honest about why she has decided to return home.  Tony knows it...Siblings have a history of knowing each other like no other.  For now let that marinate like a good pasta sauce...

The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 12 (Season 1: Episode 12 Isabella & Episode 13 I Dream of Jeannie Cusamano)

These are the two episodes of the Sopranos that I find most disturbing. The reason is because both Tony's Mother & Uncle conspire to kill him. These revelations weigh deeply on Tony. First subconsciously as I believe he realizes something is going to happen and then later once it does and he gains proof he doesn't dwell on it - he resolves to take proper revenge. The underlying reoccurring theme in this first season is Tony's mother. Dr. Melfi diagnosed Tony's mother as having a borderline personality. Let's face it this woman is a nasty piece of work. She is manipulative, dramatic, paranoid, verbally abusive and spreads guilt around like melted butter on a hot sourdough roll. Tony has tried everything to please his mother to no avail. He finally realizes this in these last two episodes.

One reason this show was so successful was that a character like Tony Sopranos was made to be sympathetic. Someone who murders, manipulates, steals, etc. for a living and we actually want him to be okay. We would rather his mother kill herself already. She is a big noose around Tony's life. There are probably countless others in the real world who have had similar experiences with their parents. This show is relatable- period. It demonstrates that no matter who you are, what you do we all have the same problems in life.

But, I am diverting my attention away from the purpose of this blog - to show the Wisdom of the Sopranos. But, maybe the show itself is wise in it's appeal to the regular person who is watching.

Episode 12 dealt this Tony's serious depression. One of his best friend's has betrayed him and he feels that something is going to happen. And of course something does happen. His Uncle issues a hit on Tony's life. After days of sleeping and apparently hallucinating/dreaming about a women named Isabella from the "old country" he leaves to see the Dr. and an attempt is made on his life. Turns out Tony's serious depression takes a turn. He wants to live and fights with his assassins to insure he lives to see another day and to take revenge. It's said that nothing give you a new release on life than an encounter with death.

Tony's relationship with this mother comes to a head in Episode 13. It's the great reveal by the F.B.I. that his mother has indeed conspired to do the worst - kill her only son. She further adds insult to injury by revealing a secret to a friend of Tony. Misguided in his method as Tony might have been attempted to save him from ruin. The friend though didn't take it that way at least initially. So, sometimes you can do someone a favor but it backfires.

Sometimes what happens to you, or doesn't is a matter of timing. Circumstance really.

"Someday soon you'll have a family of your own and if you're lucky you'll remember the little moments. Like this. That were good."

The Wisdom of the Sopranos Part 11 (Season 1: Episode 11 Nobody Knows Anything)

Never have more on you than you feel comfortable loosing (such as money).

Physical problems can be rooted in psychological problems. Remember that headache you got on a particularly stressful day at work?

Sometimes there are non-intended consequences to advice. When someone is asking you what you think they should do, etc. be cautious in your approach. The results may not be what you intended.

Some people create drama to get attention. Maybe if we paid attention to those around us more there wouldn't be so much drama.